We Wish You a Merry X-Mas
When I was at Catholic school, occasionally someone would make the grave mistake of writing Merry X-mas during the holiday season. (I won’t mention who that “someone” was for fear that they have ended up in prison and are reading this blog.) When Sister Mary Jude Magdalene von Trapp noticed, she would stare at the student with one of those terrifying nun stares and say, why are you X-ing out the name of Christ?
Well thank X there are still people doing the nun’s work. First Baptist Church of Dallas has launched a website called GrinchAlert.com, where people can post the names of businesses on either a “naughty” or “nice” list. Who gets on the naughty list? Businesses which use child labor? Lace toys with lead? Lie to customers about how their asses look in those jeans? No, no. Much worse than that. The naughty businesses don’t say Merry Christmas. Instead, they say Happy Holidays. That just makes me sick. The last time someone said Happy Holidays to me, I screamed I DIDN’T KNOW THIS WAS A JEWISH ESTABLISHMENT and promptly took my business elsewhere.
According to the Rev. Robert Jeffress of First Baptist, “Too many businesses have bowed down to political correctness. I thought this would be a fun way to call out businesses that are refusing to celebrate Christmas.” Well, that is fun. Sure, businesses might be trying to appeal to all their customers, and not just Christians, but if you’re not Christian, what are you doing buying presents anyway? Why don’t you go back to worshiping nature or some other bullshit?
I can’t believe this is the way people spend their time. Is it really that offensive to say Happy Holidays to someone? However, after perusing the Grinch website, I am happy to know that the Schlotzsky’s in Flower Mound has a beautiful Nativity scene. I’m sure the Baby Jesus would be proud.
December 10th, 2010 at 5:48 pm
I thought Nativity scenes were nature worship. Native, nature, nativity…whatever.
By Lorrie Singer thru Sara Hickman:
“Christmas for me is a dreidel – For some it’s a babe in a cradle – So grab you menorah, cause that’s what it’s for-a, And spoon on the luv with a ladle.”
Happy solistice deity worshipers. We pagans are happy to share the season with you.
But always invite at least two Baptists to your seasonal party. If you invite just one they’ll drink all the beer.
December 10th, 2010 at 6:19 pm
It wasn’t just Sister Mary Lucifer who got upset about writing Xmas – it was also our mother.
December 10th, 2010 at 6:23 pm
As I left one of my (many) doctors yesterday, I was about to wish him a Merry Christmas, but knowing he is Jewish, I said “Happy Hol….nicka…..he laughed and thanked me and wished me Season’s greetings.
The “Christian” nuts are beyond offensive: they are downright dangerous, with the simple minded actually creating dangerous situations…… did anyone see the picketing or? of E Edwards funeral….I could not bear (correctly spelled according to m the dictionary, though I’m not too sure about that) to read the article, my rantometer gauge was starting to go into the red marking.
I will leave you to your own devices to see the terrible hateful posters these people were carrying.
December 10th, 2010 at 6:37 pm
All these years I thought wishing someone “Happy Holidays” implied the entire holiday season, be it Christmas or New Years. The Jewish folks in East Texas were all Methodists, so wishing someone the Happy H-word that we couldn’t pronounce correctly wasn’t up for “diskusye.” I would like to politely tell the preacher man to stick his Grinch where the Sun don’t shine.
December 10th, 2010 at 6:38 pm
Oh, and sue me if my Yiddish is incorrect. I got it from the Internets!
December 10th, 2010 at 7:41 pm
Elves. Hell, even Santa steals from the pagans. Free the elflings, Santa. And bring the reindeer, we’re all out of venison.
December 11th, 2010 at 4:44 pm
Using “X” in as a substitute is certainly within the pale of orthodoxy, since the letter “X” in Greek is chi, which is the first letter of Christ…a common abbreviation for centuries. The pushback on Happy Holidays is simply a reaction to the uber politically correct businesses that instructed their employees to specifically NOT say Merry Christmas to customers. I find no offense in either greeting. It could become a bit cumbersome to say Merry Christmas, Happy Honukah, Happy Kawansa…maybe Merry Chrihonsadays would suffice.
December 11th, 2010 at 9:26 pm
And Happy Festivus, too.
TIME FOR THE AIRING OF GRIEVANCES!!!!!!!
I think we’ve coverd it thru the year.
December 12th, 2010 at 12:48 pm
Way to demonstrate the milk of human kindness and Christian tolerance, Jeffress. You proclaim to worship Christ. He would be appalled. For shame.
December 12th, 2010 at 11:50 pm
I always thought the X in Xmas was a cross. Which brings me to my next question. If Jesus had been hung instead of crucified, would Christians wear a noose around their neck?
December 13th, 2010 at 11:19 am
You are so going to H E double hockey sticks.
December 13th, 2010 at 11:22 am
Big party in Hell. Be there or be square!
December 13th, 2010 at 3:20 pm
If he had seen his shadow when he left the tomb, would we have 6 more weeks of winter?
Where’s Mel Gibson when the comments go down this path?
December 13th, 2010 at 4:52 pm
I’m still trying to work out the connection between Easter and pagan fertility symbols.