Like so many of you, I awoke at 2:30 this morning with news that would change the way I see the world today…. My three year old, Fleduardo, had to go potty.

Then some time after 7:00 that same Fleduardo came to my bed to tell me that I had a text message. Also, I convince him to get dressed in the morning by telling him “sometimes, baseball players wear jorts,” and this works. He’s both fun and useful.

Also fun and useful is America’s next top Vice President — Joe Biden. For those of you who can’t quite figure out how you get letters on a phone, here’s the message I received shortly after Fleduardo and I went back to bed this morning:

From: 62262
Barack has chosen Senator Joe Biden to be our VP nominee. Watch the first Obama-Biden rally live at 3pm ET on www.barackobama.com.Spread the word!
2:37am 8/23/08

So here is my expert analysis, being that I refuse to do research on a Saturday morning, and I have to be finished before Dora is over.

Joe Biden sort of reminds me of someone who would be my uncle. He’s always seemed a little too tan to be from Delaware. Delaware — I believe their top import is paid credit card bills. Also, they make a nice punch, which goes well with chili dogs, and I have only ever seen in Houston.

Biden has the whole international experience thing, and he’s capable of a successful dump, so at 66 years old, that’s a factor.

Speaking of 66, he’s not likely to be a candidate in 2016, which gives him the freedom to be the Democrat’s Cheney (sans evil) — something nice for a Democratic president to have. He’ll have the freedom to stand by unpopular decisions that that President Obama may make. With the age and experience factors, you could have a situation where it looks like the VP is pulling the strings, as it often does with Evil Cheney, but I think you’ll be able to tell who’s boss. On the other hand Biden has been quoted saying “I never worked for anybody in my life. I got here (to DC) when I was 29. I never had a boss. I don’t know how I’d handle it,” so the first person to figure it out is going to have to be him.

And so we wait til 3pm ET to see how the lovebirds look together, and we wait anxiously to see which pundit will be the first to slip up and call them “Obama, O’Biden.” My money’s on Stephanopoulos, if only because he’s distracted by the un-hairbrushed blogger who’s been stalking him since Friday afternoon.