May 6
An official with the sheet metal workers union in Indiana this week praised Hillary Clinton for her “testicular fortitude” in stark contrast to her “Gucci wearing, latte-drinking” (NOT THAT THERE’S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT, takes another sip of delicious vanilla non-fat latte) opponents. James Carville, meanwhile, said that if Hillary “gave [Obama] one of her cojones, they’d both have two.” Ouch. (No, seriously. Ouch.)
Now, I could easily turn this post into a diatribe on our sexist society, and the fact that women have to act like men in order to get ahead, but I know you all are sick of that because I’m just a girl and I should OH MY GOD STOP TALKING.
So apparently, what this really comes down to is who’s got the bigger balls. And, despite what you think of Hillary and her campaign, you’ve got to admit… she does. You may accuse her of many things — negative ads, ruining the Democratic party, pulling out all the stops, including the BIG RED MISSILE in her nuclear arsenal — but in the end, Obama kind of looks like, well, you know.
(Oh, come on. I’d still vote for him. And I wouldn’t even HOLD MY NOSE to do it, you little martyrs.)
Of course, one could argue the underdog, be it man or woman, always has to be scrappier, tougher, and more confrontational than the frontrunner. It’s like little dogs versus big dogs (ANIMAL ANALOGY). Little dogs will bark and attempt to attack bigger dogs, biting at their ankles (while feeling completely humiliated because of the ridiculous plaid sweater forced on by the owner).
The big dog looks on with amusement, confident that the little dog can’t hurt him. But then he gets annoyed because the little dog isn’t going away and he starts snapping back.
Tonight may not change anything. Or it could change everything. Most likely scenario? Hillary wins Indiana by a good margin, Obama takes North Carolina by a tighter margin than polls have suggested. This means nothing changes. Or, Hillary wins Indiana and narrowly takes North Carolina, which changes everything.
YES, I know that Obama has the delegates. But the superdelegates are picking this nominee, whichever way you look at it, and if Hillary were to win both states (however doubtful), they’ll start getting real nervous about Obama in a general. And it would be more of an incentive to unleash the NUCLEAR OPTION and seat Florida and Michigan.
Now, if Obama wins Indiana and North Carolina, game over. But that probably won’t happen either. So we’ll be right back here tomorrow, suspended in time and space. You may find this hard to believe, but even I can’t bear to watch much longer.
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Yeah, that’s the new bullshit meme being put out by Hillary’s side. Obama supporters are members of the creative class while Hillary supporters are all blue collar workers.
Re: 1. JohnCornyn’sBoxTurtle
Well, it’s true you know… Hell, I’m so blue collar, I’m wearing last season’s (*gasp*) DKNY boxer briefs!
I seem to recall a certain vote on a certain war that was was a pretty obvious ‘I would be a tough commander in chief and not a weak woman leader’ vote. HRC’s testicular fortitude doesn’t bode well for Iran or our boys in uniform. God bless James Carville though - funny as hell.
2 memos a day, plus carville’s non stop bs……
how can anyone notice that caville and matlin are married and not get hat it is ALL BS.
anyway none of it matters if the votes are not counted………..
A couple more balls and she will match Cheney or Rummy. She’ll obliterate Obama in Indiana. That’s what I’ve been thinking, we really need a swaggering macho figure that blusters hawkish foreign policy while pushing unsound economic proposals with selfish interests. We’ve never had a leader like that.
/OMG you totally lost me with all the animal analogy. horse f*cking i can follow. sheep too. but sweaters and dog psychology!? What are you some sort of vet shrink?
//I need a drink. Thank god it’s lunchtime.
“in the end, Obama kind of looks like, well, you know.”
Nope. Can’t agree there. I never thought Obama looked like a, well, you know.
And I don’t think Hll’s got cojones, either. So I can’t admit that, either.
I just hope the Amazing Superdelegates make this choice for us with a lot more thought than the voters are apparently, according to some, capable of.
Please, Superdelegates. Save us from ourselves. And the popular vote. And the delegate count….
So, what does your analogizing leave us with, 2 yapping dogs and a latte drinker? I’ll take the coffee guy, and just hope that he doesn’t actually use the word ‘vente’ in his vocabulary.
This is nuts. Haven’t we had enough cowboy diplomacy in the White House already.
Since when is Hillary the underdog?
She’s the entitled Candidate of Destiny who ran a crummy campaign and blew it. End of story.
But if her advisers wants me to think she’s a hermaphrodite to boot, well, yeah, ok.
Hillary posseses WMDs?
Balls are one thing, but it’s the size of the stick in the middle that counts. And anyone knows that the guy doing all the talking almost always has the small pecker. So Hillary is the guy with the small pecker in this analogy. Not much to be proud of there.
I’m sorry, Pink Lady, but I can’t take her seriously right now. Gas tax holiday? That’s it? Shit, McCain thought of that one.
Terry McAuliffe on MSNBC today:
“She loves to sit, throw ‘em back. So to me this is nothin’ new. We all hear about the story that she and John McCain actually had a shot contest, I think in the Ukraine or somewhere around the world. And she actually beat John McCain in a shot contest. She’s a girl from Illinois who likes to throw ‘em down with the rest of us.”
I think McAuliffe is thinking of Karen Allen in Raiders of the Lost Ark.
I’m really tired of hearing about what’s going on between the Clintons’ thighs.
http://www.showlush.com
Re: 12. JohnCornyn’sBoxTurtle
Or Karen Brooks in any of a number of bars
/you know I love you, Credentials
I thought I’d figured out something new to say about the primaries, but no.
Fortunately somewhere on the Internet someone is wrong about something, so off I go.
In other news, Veterinary Times Magazine reports that Senator Hillary Clinton recently underwent labia reduction surgery to make room for her third testicle. James Carville told Bill O’Reilly, “Hillary chose to have the work done by a vet because she does not trust those elitist medical doctors that are responsible for all of America’s medical problems for the last seven years.” TMZ reported an exclusive scoop from the veterinarian assistant that said the discarded labia tissue was in remarkably good shape and showed little signs of use.
Re: 10. The Other Guy
tells you about oreally and rush, don’t it?
http://www.inthepinktexas.com
Re: 12. JohnCornyn’sBoxTurtle
Awesome.
Re: 17. potted meat
Bound to be tiny. That’s why they’re having to do so much groping, I guess.
She has balls? Well, that’s no surprise in view of the way she very calmly strolled off that airplane while under sniper fire.
Re: 11. The Other Guy
Seriusly? “I am the candidate of change” ad infinitum for the last year and you’re criticizing Hillary for her gimmicks.