Sunday
Apr 16
Apr 16
02:02pm by TJ Shroat; General
By Teacher/Schoolboy Romance Features Editor Emeritus TJ Shroat
Alabama Teacher Accused Of Sex, Murder Plot
Notice:
I will be leaving ITPT and launching first a blog, then 24-hour news channel, devoted entirely to this subject matter. I am currently hiring staff. Please send a resume, two writing samples and at least three tasteful nudes (hey, that’s how I got the job here) to shroat@gmail.com. Attention current ITPT writers: I already have your nudes, so unless you have some new material (/cough, donkey show, /cough), don’t waste your time or mine.
The trackback URL is here.
Love the checklist.
/Everyone is speechless, except me of course.
Oh wow, man !
Wait a second man. whaddaya think the teacher’s gonna look like this year ?
My butt, man !
T-t-teacher stop that screaming, teacher don’t you see ?
Don’t wanna be no uptown fool.
Maybe I should go to hell, but I’m doin’ well,
Teacher needs to see me after school.
Chorus:
I think of all the education that I missed.
But then my homework was never quite like this.
Got it bad, got it bad, got it bad,
I’m hot for teacher.
I got it bad, so bad,
I’m hot for teacher.
Spoken:
Hey, I heard you missed us, we’re back !
I brought my pencil
Gimme something to write on, man
I heard about your lessons, but lessons are so cold.
I know about this school.
Little girl from cherry lane, how did you get so bold ?
How did you know that golden rule ?
Oh man, I think the clock is slow
I don’t feel tardy
Class dismissed
Freakin’ hilarious.
http://commonsenseblog.typepad.com
It would be really scary if Anne Ramsey played her, since Anne Ramsey is dead and has been for some time.
Gilbert Grape’s mom?? You just made me lose my horny.
/Why are severely disturbed people always such good writers?
bc - same skillset
shriznoat - that is some sick funny shit
http://www.rightoftexas.wordpress.com
No Kirstie Ally?
I miss her in movies..haven’t seen her since for richer or poorer.
What about Jamie Pressly as the teacher?
RE: Jamie Pressly.
Not this teacher. Maybe the last one. I’ll petition to update Form 2024B to include Pressly, as she definitely has skank-cred.
Why are women so scared of Juliette Lewis? What did she ever do to you?
http://austin.metblogs.com/profile.phtml?author=471
So, um, how’d those Google searches turn out?
…messy.
Isn’t that symbol at the bottom left the one for radioactive material? Jeez, were they all doing it in a nuclear reactor?
I just googled ‘Eileen Smith, nude’ and couldn’t find anything. I’ll try my stage name.
Wasn’t this the plot of the Matt Dillon/Nicole Kidman movie called “To Die For”? Teacher has sex with male student, hires student to kill husband…
My vote is for Juliette Lewis. I saw her at sxsw and she was drunk, laughing and yelling and two poor guys. Exactly as you might imagine.
http://www.inthepinktexas.com/2006/06/22/postmark-kentucky-noodling-for-dummies/
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